the list

                                     

   

  I wake up quite early, and in the wee dark hours I will sometimes scan the internet with the intent of hunting for words in the same way a hungry owl may swoop on a fox. Erroneously or not, if you, as I do, possess the sometimes unshakeable feeling that things are very very wrong, self serving or not, if my eyes alight on the right words, if someone else frames a feeling that I, too, possess, I’ll feel as though I’ve consumed the necessary calories to keep flying.I sit up straighter, I can face the day. I’m in the crowd, feeling the words from the ‘I have a dream’ speech, I’m inspired, I’m resolute, I am emboldened. And sometimes, ( I prefer the days I’m occupying a much simpler set of standards in my thought processes) I’m just on the internet, watching recorded security footage of an owl and a fox facing off each other.
    I’ve created a list. If you can get to the end of it, you can title it.



1.  No one has all of the answers. As one of my professors said recently; “ My wife can’t believe that we’ve invested all this money in my achieving a PhD just so I can say ‘ I don’t know’. Years of study and $ later, She tells me that if she asks me a question, she wants an answer. I don’t have them.”


2.    If you do decide to go to school, or even a seminar, if you do decide to trust someone with your time and investment, I’d go with someone that says things like that.

  3. Or perhaps I’m trying to justify my own investment. Consider any statement you make can be proven to be incorrect. This is the theory of dialectics ( not to be confused with ‘dianetics’, which is a Scientology term) Dialectics, basically, is discourse between two or more people holding different  points of view about a subject but wishing to establish the truth through reasoned arguments. Essentially, any theory you can come up with you should accept that it can be disproved, otherwise, you are yelling into an echo chamber filled only with your own opinions .

4. You should not have to question the validity of your own experiences. In other words, you should not have been put in that situation. If you’ve lived a certain number of years, you will have heard this phrase “ Don’t put yourself in a situation where people are mean/selfish/abusive towards you”. The old accepted adage that people are naturally sh—-, that that is a given fact, and it’s as simple as not putting a bullseye target on your chest and walking in front of an archer. None of that is true. You are not an idiot if you have been taken advantage of. Life is an indefinable moving target of variables with an ever evolving roster of weapons, and there’s no clearly marked area to avoid.

5. ‘Let it Go’.
  I’d like to bottle those three syllables and sell it back to everyone who has ever said it.
You are the sum total of your history, and you will carry your history with you your whole life.

6. Consider the past. The very ancient past, when people lived within a stone’s throw off their loved ones, everyday, all day. This is true for even current (rapidly disappearing) cultures that have existed continuously for upwards of 30,000 years. Just consider the scope of that timeline. Put yourself in that context. Every person in your ‘tribe’ would matter, would contribute to your well being. No one would be disposable. Now consider that nagging feeling you (may) have, of being abandoned, forgotten, unimportant. How ‘real’ do you consider other people to be? How easily disposed of? If you are someone who does not see the value in others, consider the favour returned.

7. The tougher people tell you they are, the tougher they are not. Deflective, defensive, deeply wounded, angry, fearful; yes. For every tough guy and gal, as cross hatched and leathery a hide as they may display, it is a brittle house of cards on the inside.

8. Exercise. Eat your veg and fruits. ‘Nuff said. Someone can teach you this ( and they will charge)

9. Your life has meaning. For the very reason that if you are reading this ( which is ridiculous because there are many people alive, not reading this) but this is the only direct statement I can make, as to my words and your specific visual-to-cognitive processing system. You, are alive. This is meaningful.

     I’ll leave it at that for today.